eCards

Funny Pictures

Online Games

Jokes

What Sucks?

What Rocks?

Horoscope

Wallpapers

Search jokes for:   Category: Blind Jokes A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu. "I'm sorry, sir, but I am blind and can't read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer. I'll smell it and order from there." A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man's table and hands it to him. . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke A Blind man walks into a department store with his guide dog on a leash. As usual the store manager behind the customer service counter looks up, notices the customer is blind, and not wanting to stare quickly looks away again. Out of the corner of his eye the manager sees the blind man start swinging the dog over his head by its leash. Shocked, the manager runs over and says "mister is there a problem - is there anything i can help you with?" The blind man calmly replies &qu . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke A blind man is walking down the street with his seeing-eye dog one day. They come to a busy intersection, and the dog, ignoring the high volume of traffic zooming by on the street, leads the blind man right out into the thick of traffic. This is followed by the screech of tires and horns blaring as panicked drivers try desperately not to run the pair down. The blind man and the dog finally reach the safety of the sidewalk on the other side of the street, and the blind man pulls . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke Two girls were hired to clean a big house. The owners left for work and there was nobody home, so they decided to take their clothes off. They worked naked for a few hours, when they heard the door-bell. "Who is it?", one of the asked. "It's a blind-man", answered the man from outside. Since they realized he couldn't see them anyway, they decided to stay the way they were. They opened the door, and the man holding a box of drapery rods . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke A Jewish man took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench and began eating. A little while later a blind man came by and sat down next to him. Feeling neighborly, the Jewish man passed a sheet of matzo to the blind man. The blind man handled the matzo for a few minutes, looked puzzled, and finally exclaimed, "Who wrote this stuff?" Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke An elderly couple was driving across the country. While the woman was behind the wheel, the couple was pulled over by the highway patrol. "Ma'am, did you know you were speeding?" the officer said. The woman, hard of hearing, turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" "He said you were speeding!" the old man yelled. The patrolman then asked, "May I see your license?" The woman turned to her husb . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said, "Ma'am did you know you were speeding?" The woman, hard of hearing, turns to her husband and asks, "What did he say?" The old man yells, "He says you were speeding!" The patrolman says, "May I see your license?" The woman turns to her husband and asks again, "What did he say?" The old man ye . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke One day, this woman went to a bait shop to get her husband a fishing reel for his birthday. After selecting one, she inquired as to its cost. The owner replied, "I'm sorry, ma'am, but I'm blind and cannot see what reel you have. If you drop it on the floor, I'll recognize it and be of more help." So she did just that. After hearing it hit the floor, the owner said, "That's the Johnson Model 9400. It'll be $40.00." The woman decided . . . Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke A blind man and his dog go into the supermarket and then the blind man takes his dog by the collar and starts to swing him around over his head, knocking things off the shelves. The manager comes up to the blind man and asks "excuse me sir, can I help you?" the blind man answers "no thanks, I'm just looking around". Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke The blind man was out walking with his Seeing Eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man's leg. Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and patted the dog's head. Having watched what happened, a passerby said, "Say, why are you patting him?That dog just peed on your leg!" "I know," said the blind man, "but I gotta find his head before I can kick his butt. " Rating: Email this joke Rate this joke         Send this page to a friend!